Find What Makes Them Tick

YOUNG ME: “How do you work so well with different people?”

MANAGER: “I find what makes them tick.”

That was the best advice I EVER got in dealing with different people.

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Communication is something that we all struggle with.  Everyone has different life stories, cultures, success and failures.  However,  when it boils down to it,  we are all just people who want to be listened to and understood.  This is why it is important to find what makes people “tick” … aka … what makes motivates people … what makes them happy.

How do you find what makes people “tick”?

It’s not easy … nor is it an exact science … but here are a 5 tips that I find help with the process.

TIP # 1:  LISTEN
The most important, but often missed step in the process.

When you are truly listening to someone all your focus is on them and you process every single word they are saying.  You do not interrupt them.  You let them stop speaking before you speak or form you own opinions.

It’s a very simple concept, but we don’t always do this.  Especially when we are in a hurry or know what we want.

Also,  when you are listening to someone you will learn how they communicate… direct, very formal, casual, scattered … etc.  You will also see if they are decisive, indecisive, or really laid back.

Listening reveals a lot about what makes a person tick and the language style to use when communicating with them.

TIP # 2:  DON’T STEREOTYPE
This has always been a big NO NO.  By stereo typing someone you are sticking them in a box that they might not belong in.  Put aside your pre-conceived notions of how you think someone is or how you think they should be … and focus on who they really are.

By setting aside all stereotypes,  you focus on the true person and do not make assumptions based on what you do not know first hand.

This will help helps you figure out what type of person they are…. You see if they are a happy or a sad person.  If they are strong willed or insecure.

TIP #3: SHARE SOMETHING PERSONAL
It doesn’t have to be your deepest darkest secret, but share something that shows you’ve got a little bit of life experience.

This will allow you to gauge how comfortable this person is about their personal life.  Sometimes they’ll respond with a very personal story … and sometimes they’ll just nod their heads.

Depending on their response you can unveil if they have are a very private person or a very open person.  You might even discover they have hidden talents or skills that they don’t always openly talk about.

TIP # 4: BE HONEST
Being honest shows sincerity and proves that you are not a robot.  People don’t like to talk to robots, people like to talk to people.

Be honest with yourself and the person you are talking to.  This will establish a trust and open communication.  They might even openly communicate what makes them happy w/o you having to ask.

TIP #5: BE OPEN MINDED
Don’t be distracted by other peoples differences.  Accept people for who they are and try not to wish upon them who you wish they would be.

Instead … focus on their strengths and what you do like about them.   You do not have the power to change them so you might as well get over it and move forward.

Easier said than done, especially if you have very strong opinions or are very strong willed.

To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others.

– Tony Robbins

I’m no expert in communication BUT I can say that the moment I started to find what makes people “tick” my life got a little easier.

Happy people help make the world “tick.”

Happy Little Snowman

A few of the snowmen before I gave them away

I wanted to give my coworkers a small but thoughtful Christmas gift.  My intention was to make them smile and to bring a little holiday cheer into the office. 

While browsing youtube for “holiday arts and crafts” and I came accros a video that discussed holiday crafts.  At about 1:51 the lady showed little snowmen made out of socks.  I thought the idea of using baby socks as a beanie was too cute!  It inspired me to take that idea and create my own little version of snow peeps!

A couple days later I brought my little snow peeps to work.  Everyone who received one was suddenly so happy!!  Their eyes lit up, their voices got a little high pitched, and they were just filled with joy!  I didn’t realize that these little snowmen would bring so much glee!! 

Since these little snowmen generated so much happiness, I decided to make my first youtube tutorial.  I want to share how to make these little guys so that whoever is watching can make them, share them, and spread more happiness! 

Enjoy watching the video below:

or click here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ek4p75_siis

just me,
Cat

Happy Thoughts

Jaclyn Rae recently commented on one of the posts in our blog.  It prompted me to read her blog and I thought this blog was AWESOME!

http://polkadotteapot.wordpress.com/2010/12/01/happy-thoughts/

She wrote about how she keeps a journal dedicated to happy thoughts.  I can see that being a valuable reference to anyone who is in need of a “pick me up.”

Happy happy, joy joy!
Cat

Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

Today my co-worker went to Chipotle, opened his wallet and discovered that all that remained was one lonely little card. And it wasn’t even a credit or debit card. 😦

The person behind the counter was kind enough to let him have his food for free.

Trying to think the best of people, he tried to find places around him where things could have fallen out. He even asked a few people if they were playing a joke on him. Unfortunately … No luck.

Later on that day he said that he wasn’t angry or even upset about it. He said it wasn’t worth it. I also over heard him say, “if someone took it … How sad is that?” As though he felt bad for the other person.

He’s a GREAT example of how to act in that situation. Feeling upset or angry won’t solve or change what happened. Accept it and move forward.

Cheers to not letting the small stuff ruin your day!

Just me,
Cat

Happy Love

Happy Thanksgiving!  I’ve got so much to be thankful for…caring family, wonderful amazing friends, stable career, and the list goes on and on and on… just very thankful for everything God has blessed me with.  I’m surrounded by so much love, and love in all forms is a special thing.  Thank you to all the awesome people in my life!

I’d also like to share a very special Height of Happiness.  One year ago today, my boyfriend Ryan told me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, and asked me to marry him!   I was  lucky enough to find such a  genuine guy who makes me laugh every day, and is always willing and ready to take me on.   He’s one of the  most positive forces that surround me.  He always finds a way to be optimistic about any situation, and that has really helped me overcome challenging times.   We all need supportive people like that in our lives.  I can honestly say that he has helped me want to be a better person.  I can’t thank him enough for being who he is, and always believing in me.  He’s definitely one of the reasons I wake up with a smile on my face.  I can’t wait to marry him.  Very thankful for the Happy Love.

– sharon

Season of Change

“You can’t avoid change, it’s mandatory, progress however is optional.”    – Bill R. Good Jr.

They say that fall is the season of change.  Maybe this season we should try to find something to change about ourselves…in a good way of course!  Change is inevitable anyways and we might as well make the most of it.  So let’s make it count.  Steer it towards something that makes you a better and happier person, whether it effects you or someone else.  Whatever it may be, big or small, there’s always something we can improve.  Try to step outside your box.  We should always strive to grow and learn… and it’s fun to shake things up a bit.

Here’s a few ideas: 

• Try something new.  It revives the soul.
• Ever find yourself saying “I always wanted to….” Now is the time to do it!
• Show some selflessness.  Do something nice for someone else…even if it’s for a stranger.
• Give up a bad habit.
• Start a journal…or a blog!
• Tap into your creative side.
• Stop being  negative about….
• Give someone a thoughtful gift for no reason.
• Smile at the person who can usually get under your skin.
• Tell yourself that you will wake up in a good mood everyday.
• Care more about what we put in our bodies.  Eat good, look good, feel good.
• Get physical.  Challenge yourself.
• Give yourself some more “me” time.
•  Find something to laugh about every day.  Laugh out loud and from the heart.

Have fun and good luck!

– sharon

One Vision

“If Catherine has one vision and George has one vision … what do you have?  Division.”  – Father Manny, St. Michael’s church.

2 years ago today,  the priest told us the above quote at our wedding ceremony.  His little quote still makes us giggle and our friends still talk about it … but we all know that Father Manny was right.   Although we’ve only been married for 2 years,  we have been together for 10 years.  I’d be lying if I said our relationship has always been filled with candy and roses.  We do have the occasional “debate.”

Gee and I have always said that we don’t fight … we debate!  What makes a fight different from a debate is that we are really listening to each other and trying to understand the other person’s point of view.  After our debate,  we come to some sort of compromise and decide what the best thing is to do. 

I make our debates sound very civil, huh?  It’s not always that way.  Sometimes they get really heated and sometimes we cry … but we never go to bed angry.   We always come to some sort of compromise or we realize at the end how silly we were for debating in the first place. 

After we got married our debates have gotten shorter.  One of the reason’s that they have gotten shorter is we started to say, “One Vision!”  in the middle of our debate.  It always lightens the mood and reminds us that we’ve got to get to the point and compromise.

Always remember to share the same vision with your partner.  If there are any disagreements … don’t fight … debate!

just me,
Cat

You can do it!

I’ve been catching up on Grey’s Anatomy season 6.  If you are not familiar with this show,  it’s a medical drama tv series that focuses on the lives of several  surgeons.  To me,  it’s more about life than it is the surgeries.

While watching season 6 the quote, “Just because you’ve never done it, doesn’t mean you can’t” was said a couple of times. 

That quote reminds me of all the times I’ve said, “I can’t,” “I don’t know how,” or “you do it, I’m scared.”  Those were moments of panic and fear where I doubted myself and my ability as a human being.  In those moments,  I missed the opportunity to become something great.

There is always going to be a little fear inside of when we are faced with something new.  We fear the consequences if something goes wrong so much that we let it hinder our ability to move forward and see the consequences if everything goes right.

In the moments when I’ve said, “Sure,” “Why not, it’s fun,”  or “I’ll do it with some help” … I’ve been able to work through the fear and see that 99% of the time,  everything works out okay.  I walk away with more knowledge and that knowledge makes me GREAT.  It’s the one thing that no one can take away from you.

Get over the initial fear and you’ll be able to accomplish all your little heart desires.

Be brave!
Cat

Firework

So my fave feel good song of the moment would have to be Katy Perry’s “Firework”.  The message is empowering, and it’s set to a sweet beat.   It just sounds like fun, and there aren’t too many songs in mainstream media that are so encouraging!  I’m sure you’ve heard it by now, but here’s a youtube.com video with lyrics for your listening & viewing pleasure…enjoy!

“maybe your reason why all the doors are closed…so you could open one that leads you to the perfect road” – katy perry

It’s been a while…

Where has the time gone?!?  I can’t believe this year is almost over already, and I haven’t written a blog in months!  Thankfully co-blogger, Cat, has been holding things down here at HOH. =)

 

So there has been a lot of changes and situations in my life lately that have kept me pretty busy and consumed.  Some great, some bad, and some eye opening.  However, many situations are out of my control.  I’ve had to adjust my mindset and perceptions of things several times the past few months, and that’s not always an easy thing to do.  I guess I could say I’ve sort of been standing in different lines at the same time, trying to figure out which moves to make, and waiting for the resolutions to come.  Nonetheless, I just try to remember to take on each challenge as it comes, and remind myself of a lot of the things that the blog entries we write on HOH are all about.  When life gives you lemons, right?  Doing my best to be positive, and believing that it will all be okay goes such a looong way!  Things could definitely be worse, and in time they WILL get better.  Seriously, having positive influences in your life is such a powerful thing!  They’ve really helped me keep my head up!  Always remember, the world has a funny way of working itself out…and it always will!  We will keep growing!  Have a nice day!

– Sharon